Somewhere over the rainbow
Way up high,
There’s a land that I heard of
Once in a lullaby.

Somewhere over the rainbow
Skies are blue,
And the dreams that you dare to dream
Really do come true.

Someday I’ll wish upon a star
And wake up where the clouds are far
Behind me.
Where troubles melt like lemon drops
Away above the chimney tops
That’s where you’ll find me.

Somewhere over the rainbow
Bluebirds fly.
Birds fly over the rainbow.
Why then, oh why can’t I?

If happy little bluebirds fly
Beyond the rainbow
Why, oh why can’t I?

“Is this what i really want to do for the rest of my life?”

“The fact that i’m irritable irritates me.”

“I miss having a dog. I miss Becky.”

“I think too much sometimes to the point of thinking just for the sake of thinking.did that sentence make sense?”

“IF i ever do get married in some distant future and have my own home, I want to have 3 dogs, 1 cat, and 2 baby bunnies.”

“I’m glad I can fully differentiate a mere crush from true love. I’m less than glad that I have yet to experience the latter. but hey, i’m only 22 17.”

“I’m not as emotional as i sound.”

“Why the heck am i typing any of this down? -.- “

Have so much to talk about actually but time doesn’t permit for now. One more month though. And then i’ll have much more time to talk endlessly, hah.

I feel like i’m almost reaching the finish line (one of many). This month is going to be tough but i guess i’ve been through worse. I still have difficulty accepting the fact that I’m almost completely done with uni life for good. fuuh it’s been a ride alright.Both good and bad.

Okay, till next time. Signing out!

How I was so excited,nervous and perhaps feeling every other feeling i possibly could that day. From the moment i got up, got ready, took the train to Pyramid, had lunch with the rest (still amazed i was able to eat that day), waiting by the lift for what seemed like hours to be ushered upstairs, finally going up, waiting outside the room and letting out that not so silent squeal when he finally came up, passed by us and waved hello as he walked into the room. Having a lovely chat with another great guy who turned out to be the events organizer, meeting yvette in person and spazzing out together and then, finally, being led into the room where he was waiting for us. And as we walked towards him, seeing him flash that familiar big smile and extending his hand for a firm handshake and with the most sincere, happy “Heyyy!”  – those moments were nothing short of amazing. Everything else that happened after that only got better. Every second was precious. I wished time could have stopped then and there for just a little while, but we had to leave. As we were leaving, I turned to catch a last glimpse of that glowy face and he once again flashed that big, shy smile as he waved goodbye for the last time.

Lovely, lovely people.

Out of all the 4 days he was here, if i had to choose, i guess this would have been my favourite day. But the next day when i finally got to hear him sing 6 full songs with my own ears and just cleared my mind and enjoyed every note, that was equally the best moments of that crazy week too.

Another top favourite moment of that entire week (:

Its still so hard to believe one full year has flown by just like that. Looking back, i am ever more grateful for those times i had. It had its ups and downs, but every beautiful memory and moment from those times will last a lifetime. And i will be looking back at those times again and again, even years from now.  (:

Anyway.haha. I’ve officially started my 4 month long internship starting today. Currently under this company called, Mewah Oils of which i believe most have never heard of.Neither have i actually,until a turn of events led me to know about the existence of this company haha. It’s basically an oil refinery company, specialising in fats and oils and i’m currently placed under the R&D department. So my working place is basically a margarine-scented lab(lol) and my ‘uniform’ for most of the day is a lab coat. The really ironic thing is, i’ve told myself and a number of others how much i dislike working in a lab and NEVER plan to ever work under the R&D line after i graduate. But haha.His ways are higher than mine. When I first got the email from someone at UCSI in charge of emailing the students the various vacancies available at various companies, and i opened the email regarding this particular company, read it and without a second thought..totally crossed it off my mental list because..i was never interested in working in an oil refinery company as well. HAHA yes im fussy i know -.-

But it seems,God had a different plan in mind.This and that led to me eventually having to opt for this job without much choice and as i started doing a little more research, i realised it was actually a very well established but low key company. And after a pretty much disastrous interview i would say, i somehow still got the job, praise Him (:And not only that,He also made sure i didn’t have to go through this whole experience alone.literally.

So today..hm.Basically,here are my findings for the day:

I am most drowsy at 11-12ish. After 4 months worth of holidays,that would be..normal i assume. Which leads me to my next point..

I need at least 6 hrs of sleep a day for working days from now onwards. *imposes curfew*

I am easily fascinated by good architecture and still not quite used to a working place of mega proportions in terms of land size. (This culture shock could be attributed to my 2 month job at the-bakery-that-shall-not-be-named whose workplace was half the size of my room)

I can’t seem to EVER wear shoes(the working kind,not sneakers) without inflicting blisters on my foot.

You actually get to do sensory evaluation on chocolates and french fries on the first day of work!

You can play tic tac toe or “Find the word within that word” game with your friend to pass time on the first day of work.

I am still getting used to the fact of NOT seeing the computer screen for 11 hours a day.It used to be the other way around way i think.

I begin to feel that famous statement, “Studying life is much better than working life” truly being vindicated.

I am actually glad i got the job. Its a good company with organised plans all laid out regarding what they want to teach trainees like me. Its relevant,good exposure and will certainly look good on my resume. But i guess i am still trying to find my footing. I have to admit, i am scared.Scared because i can’t see myself coping with work and thesis at the same time. Scared because i find the job slightly intimidating and demanding. Scared because,as if the thesis wasn’t enough,there are projects that i will need to do too for work. Scared because i keep thinking to myself, “If only that darn thesis didn’t exist,work would actually be much more enjoyable.” But fact is,it DOES exist. And i don’t know how..but i need to let go of these fears to Him.I need to trust Him,more and more each day.Because only when i fully do,no fear can hold me prisoner.

The next few months is probably (or definitely) going to be the toughest 4 months of this year. But somehow,despite the storm that lies ahead or the darkness that seems to loom, there is that sure voice that reminds me constantly, “He will see you through. Just as He always had in the past.” And i guess, like Pr.Kenneth said, if we can see or calculate something and know that there are no risks or sacrifices involved, that’s not faith. I guess its about time i start living by faith and not by sight. And i need to take a step of faith..into the unknown.

Goodnight dearies and have a great week(or month) ahead.

Should be getting ready for bed soon but am just compelled to write this following a devotional time earlier. Being reminded of His great love. And this thought just came to me..of how loved i am. To put it in perspective, this was what came to my mind.

He is the Almighty God.The One who created the Earth.The sun.the Moon.the Stars.the planets.our solar system.our galaxy.the entire universe. And..you,me,US – we’re ordinary human beings in ONE planet in ONE galaxy out of the thousands or millions out there.

And it makes me realise..MAN.we must be like..microorganisms to Him,you know what i mean? You know the cartoon, Horton Hears A Who? We are like the people of Whoville – So small,so fragile,so…insignificant when we see everything else He created.

To put it in perspective,we are like the people of Whoville in that cartoon – a speck. and yet,yet..He knows us by name.He knows our dreams,fears,desires and thoughts.He hears our every prayer,our every cry.He helps us even with the pettiest things (praying for parking space?Pretty sure we’ve done that before). He sees every tear we shed.He calls us…Friend.Son.Daughter.Precious Child. And most of all, He actually lowered Himself down to the form of a human being (microorganisms in relation to the entire universe remember?) and He didn’t stop there,no. But He died for you and me.and not just died,but died a sinner’s death on the cross.And all because..He simply loves us. And that..that just…blows my mind away.How can anyone possibly do that?For someone ‘good’,that is amazing enough.But for sinners?For ordinary people like me. Just..mind blowing.

And sometimes i have to admit,i forget how much i am loved. If only i would just remember that every second of every day,i think i would be a much more joyful,thankful and better person.And i certainly hope that i will learn to remember that more often everyday and not just during devotions because man.This love is just..WOW. It makes me speechless and yet makes me want to gush this entire post out. haha. I hope you will be blessed by this love and come to know it if you have yet to. Because this love will never,ever fail you. Hugs!

Jesus, It’s You, It’s been You

This love You gave, This life You’ve saved.

In terms of my ohsodreadfulthesis, i haven’t made much progress but i had some great times meeting up and catching up with good friends and also hearing and receiving from His word – especially two of the Sundays this month in which Ps Kenneth shared about the power of speech and resolutions. Until now,i can still remember clearly what those messages were about and by His grace, i am trying to apply and practice that in my life and in doing so, grow from faith to faith, from strength to strength.

One thing i’ve to note is the job hunt that i’ve been on this past month as well. Jobstreet,classifieds,university,etc..i’ve been looking and praying for a good place at a good company for my 4 month internship. The hunting part isn’t too bad.In fact,most times, i find it to be pretty interesting..you know,reading the job description and stuff. But the waiting part is no fun at all.And i guess its always like that isnt it? It’s the waiting part that makes us feel helpless and impatient..but i shall wait, with faith!  Also, thank God for some clarity and sense of direction He’s given me as well. When i got a job offer from GNC as a Nutritionist, i seriously pondered if i should take up the offer. Good pay, workplace is like..5 minutes from my place..but after much thought and prayer, I decided that this wasn’t the line i wanted to be in. And before this,i was still so unsure of what i wanted to do. But now i have a sense of direction. I don’t feel as aimless anymore and i know Clearly what i want to do. And praise Him for that!

I would say 2010 didn’t start off with a bang. But it started off good. And even perhaps, great. Trusting Him that this will be a great year ahead and a fruitful one!

p/s – i always tell myself to keep it short but my fingers has a mind of its own.sorry.

January

- Fresh off the 2-month nightmare of internship at Cold Storage, headed back to uni for a brand new semester.It was the final semester of my 2nd year and I can barely (actually can’t at all) remember the subjects I took but it was one of the HARDEST and most torturing semester i’ve had in UCSI. But once again, by His grace, He saw me through and i came out victorious. =)

- Had my FIRST outing with all of the AAM Mods along with Joyce and Eunice.Was also the first time i got to met a few of them in person after forming AAM (: Sweet times,sweet times indeed.

- Becky, my pet dog of 14 years, passed away while i was at Cheras.Sometimes I hear the neighbour’s dogs barking and still think that it’s her,forgetting that she’s no longer here. i still miss her.

February

- CNY! Met my crazy cousins again after they were back from Aussie (:

March

- Ran for my life from an imaginary fire. But not without taking my laptop with me first!

- Redeemed Rally! The last CF rally i’ll ever be involved in,sadly.

April

- One of, if not, the most exciting,happening and crazy month in the entire year. April 8-11 will never be the same for me. In the span of this 4 days, I was blessed enough to meet,greet,shake the hand,take a picture,and hug the guy who’s had such a tremendous impact on my life. The guy who brought much joy,smiles and laughter, and best of all,the amazing friends I would not have gotten to know without him. It was the week I met David in person. The week i got to hear him sing with my own ears. The week that he took a picture with about a hundred AAM-ers as a group. That was a week i’ll never forget. As crazy as it was to plan everything, and as much as it hurts having to see the true colors of other people you have regarded as your friends, it was worth it in the end.

May

- Start of the final year in UCSI. And the beginning of the nightmare,that is the Thesis that comes along with the semester.

July

- First time I took such drastic actions to eliminate a moth. With the help of a few friends.

August

- Bid farewell to the 2nd home in Cheras where I’ve stayed for the past 1.5 years.

- CF Camp! The last one i’ll get to join,sadly

September

- 1st year Anniversary of AAM. It was hard to believe a year has already flew by since it all started.

- Final semester of classroom studies in UCSI.

October

- Took my very last examination ever and bid farewell to the Exam Hall for good (:

- Went to 2 schools to conduct a survey for the thesis. Children are so innocent (well,some) and adorable.

- Attended a different church for the first time after 7 years and felt happy there.Learnt a ton and caused me to re-think certain things and making a choice.

November

- I turned 21! (: And was privileged to celebrate it multiple times with people i love.

- Went on a roadtrip to Malacca with lovely people and then a holiday to Penang with an amazing family and good friend (: Going to those 2 places i have not been to in AGES within 1 month – that,i feel a sense of accomplishment!lol.

December

- Had my first encounter with snatch thieves & lost my 2.5 yr old beloved SE phone, along with 3 stitches as a souvenir lol.

- Spent Christmas with good friends and family.

- Being a part of something big, most probably for the last time with these people and in this setting.

- Spending quality time with the crazy cousins i love dearly.From sleepovers to mamaks to lala picture taking, I enjoyed every single moment. And learnt to treasure them even more being reminded that they are the only cousins and relatives i’m close and can connect with.

- Finally making the decision that I have put off for so long and taking that step of faith to believe that this choice I made will help me grow in Him.

- Did not attend Watchnight service for the first time in years lol. Instead,went up to Look Up point with an overview of the whole of KL with 3 friends and welcomed the new year with a bang.

————————————————————————————————————————————————–

Indeed, it wasn’t all good and happy times. There were plenty of bad experiences, horrid memories and tears of disappointment and regret. I would say that the share of the good and bad times were pretty equal although I seem to be able to recall only more of the good ones (which is a good thing heh). But all in all,2009 has been such a memorable year for me – good or bad. I dare say I’ve grown to be more mature,albeit slightly. But you know what they say, slow and steady wins the race hahaha. But yeah, I’ve come to have a slightly different perspective in how I see things. And also come to learnt that people can change in a matter of time. And i only hope that in 2010, I will be a better person. That I will see things through His perspective and in a more mature, godly manner. To have a better character and attitude towards life and towards people. It is hard, but I hope that as i look back on 31st December 2010, I will be able to say, “Thank You Lord for all that i’ve learnt and become this year.”

As for 2009, thank You Father for everything! For Your constant love and faithfulness,and EVERY single day that You were with me, through thick and thin. Your mercies are indeed new every morning!

So here’s wishing each and every one of you a very Happy and Blessed New Year! And may 2010 be an even greater year!

Where did time disappear to, I have no clue lol.

Thank YOU for Christmas. Because of You,we have a hope for the future, a purpose for living, and a reason to celebrate.

We love and give because You first loved us and gave us Your absolute BEST.

Blessed Christmas everyone!